Memory Lane

'Honestly, if you had told me a year ago that we would be living in Virginia this year- I would have laughed out loud.' I said this to my husband last weekend as we marveled over the fact that he is now hard at work as an insurance adjuster on the east coast and we spend our free time splashing in the Potomac River. Who would've thought?
Beyond the fact that we'd never imagined ourselves on this coast, there's the sobering reality that last year at this time I didn't even know if/how I would celebrate my 27th birthday! We had yet to discover the reason behind my rapidly declining health and mobility; scary, life-altering possibilities were still being debated over and tested for.

Wrapping up 'birthday week' over here; I was able to uphold my tradition of celebrating much longer than necessary! And even before the festivities began, I had already received one of the greatest gifts this side of Heaven. This summer I have been able to RUN after my boys, scoop them up in my arms and tickle their little ribs! I am healthy!
Last year at this time, I was using our kitchen stool as a walker. Some days every-single-step felt like an absolute impossibility. I remember standing in the shower, my entire body wracked with sobs, not knowing if my tears were brought on by pain or by the terrifying amount of unknowns pressing down on my little family.
I haven't gone down memory lane in a while and it brings me to tears to venture there now. But as I do, it is humbling to remember what that part of my journey was like. Because of memory lane, I am flooded with gratitude as I recognize the gift of TODAY and the health I am operating out of in this moment. 'O LORD my God, you have performed many wonders for us. Your plans for us are too numerous to list. You have no equal. If I tried to recite all your wonderful deeds, I would never come to the end of them.' Psalm 40:5

Derek and I wandered farther down memory lane. We were astonished not only by the crazy turns our life has taken but by the ridiculous, astonishing grace and faithfulness of our Heavenly Father throughout each chapter.
I just turned 27 which means 10 years ago right now I was a 17 year old simply wanting to live my best summer yet. I had no idea that Derek Pearl was about to move back to our tiny mountain town and right into my heart. If you had told me that a year later I would be packing my bags for a Bible school in Australia WITH said heart stealer, Derek Pearl, I would definitely have laughed! Our time living in another country, digging deep into the teachings of Jesus and all the experiences that came with it, were foundational in so many ways. If you had mentioned how, the year after that, I'd be planning our wedding, well, I might actually have passed out.
If someone had told us, one year into marriage, that we would soon be turning our back on the 'American Dream', purchasing one way tickets to Hawaii and taking up residence in an abandoned orchid greenhouse, we would have guffawed! (I love that word!) We spent our second and third years of marriage running a coffee farm, living completely by faith, starting a landscaping business, and experiencing life in ways some people never will. These were years of extremely hard work and very little income and yet the memories remain some of our absolute favorites.
If you had told us, elbows deep in the coffee cherries from our second harvest and preparing for the birth of our first son, that doors of ridiculous housing opportunity would begin opening, I would have cried tears of joy.  We spent our last two years of 'island life' in various care-taking positions and I'm actually sure I did cry happy tears a few times as we moved from one incredible home to the next. God orchestrated every single detail of the way! This chapter of our life was an absolute impossibility apart from the One who takes pleasure in accomplishing His purposes through unbelievable methods.

When we moved back to Colorado from Hawaii in 2015, we had no idea we would start our own business, purchase land, begin construction on our first home, and experience a deeper, truer growth in our faith than ever before. There is no anticipating these things! We brought our second son home to the tiny, mountain town where we both grew up. We cheered our toddler on as he ran the same bases Derek used to play T-ball on! And my battle with Reactive Arthritis would have looked drastically different without the invaluable help of family and friends, as well as connections to doctors and health insurance that we wouldn't have otherwise had. While it may not always seem like it in the moment, God's timing truly is perfect, and I've got a memory lane rich with proof.

Now, here we are in Virginia! We don't know what all will come of this time but I have no doubt we will look back on 2018 in years to come and say things like, 'If you had told us THEN that we would be doing THIS now, we would have laughed!' or 'Wow, look how God orchestrated every single detail of that time in our life!' (I've already said that a few times and we're only half way through the year!)
The point is that we should never underestimate what God is up to. Every season of my life has had incredible challenges intertwined with unbelievable beauty and I believe it ALL has eternal significance. I pray that Derek and I will teach our boys by example, looking back on our lives, seeing evidence of God in every day and giving thanks for all He has brought us to and through. Psalm 145:4 'One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.'

I recently read 'Hinds' Feet On High Places', an incredible allegorical novel by Hannah Hurnard. This book helped to open my eyes to massive amounts of 'behind the scenes' work going on at all times in each of our lives. God equips us with strength, joy, and peace for the journey. But His purposes also intermingle with sorrow, pain, and hardship in ways we may never comprehend, and this is of the utmost significance.
At one point, the young woman in the story, Much-Afraid, comes across a single golden flower growing in spite of it's seemingly impossible location in the desert. This flower's name is Acceptance-with-Joy and that idea of perseverance, and complete trust in the Shepherd even when life takes unexpected turns, is what I long for my life to reflect. I am also journeying to the High Places, following the Shepherd, and doing battle with Fear and Pride. The chapters of my story have had countless ups and downs, but the fact remains, they are all PART of the story and orchestrated by an all-knowing Father who loves me fiercely. May I accept each part of the journey with JOY, refusing to let any desert sands keep me from blossoming into who Jesus is making me into.

Jesus is at work in us at this very moment in preparation for all that is to come. He has been at work in us all along and the same is true of your lives. Like Paul said, '..being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.' Philippians 1:6 May we refuse to underestimate where we are now, because it is part of the journey. And may we intentionally reflect on how far we have come, that we might give glory to the God who orchestrates it all, brings beauty from pain, and grows flowers in the middle of the desert!

In the middle of the night, 

I look up to the sky 

I can hear You

Singing over me

Through the fire and the flood

I know that I am loved

I can hear You

Singing over me

-Urban Rescue