'Child, YOU MATTER!'

Sitting indian-style there on the grass, I offered up my apology.  At first, it appeared as though my son's sole focus was shredding tiny flowers from the bush in our front yard.  But when my ramblings came to an end, he took a pause from the flower demolition job.  He picked a single, pink bud between miniature thumb and index finger and oh-so-carefully brought it to his Mama.  He looked into my eyes, smiled and then was off.  He brought me more flowers, filled my whole skirt with them.  We started tossing pink buds in the air, letting them rain down on us while we giggled.  Just like that I was forgiven; shortcomings forgotten.  Sweet, sweet grace.
The reason for my apology lie somewhere between dragging Owen all across this side of the island, being a check-list gestapo and also 'needing' to attend to one hundred and one things on my phone.  All he wanted was to go outside; my sweet boy.  I know that our life can't revolve around what he wants and errands must be run but, honestly, this day I had pushed too hard.  He brought me my shoes as I vacuumed, pulled on my leg as I layered the lasagna.  I kept saying 'Almost, love... almost.'  And when we actually made it outside, just minutes before the sun was about to set, I finally got it.  Finally realized that in the rush to get everything done it's so easy to brush past the few things that matter

I've found that the sweetest of times may transpire from the most basic of ingredients.  Whether I'm with Derek or Owen or a sweet friend, the beautiful moments are made up of simply sharing in life together.  It doesn't have to be gourmet or spic' and span or expertly planned.  Looking someone in the eye and being there whether they want to talk or not; loving, laughing and refusing to be distracted- these are the only ingredients necessary to let someone know they matter!  My boys certainly appreciate delicious food but they'll be perfectly content with bean and cheese burritos if it means I'm actually sitting with them, enjoying the moment.  There's a balance of course, which I learn and re-learn on a daily basis.  But it's possible that I tend to speak a love language of doing when the ones around me hear love best through my simply being.
It was first thing in the morning, I had just heated up Owen's milk and we were both sitting on the floor rubbing sleep from our eyes.  The coffee was taking exceptionally long to brew and I was wondering why, exactly, the day had begun so early.  But pretty soon I made funny eyes at him and some milk spilled out of his crooked grin. A tickle fight ensued and the day seemed a bit less daunting.  It reminded me of times spent on the floor with MY Dad, eating ice cream and discussing the mysteries of life or... nothing at all.  I don't remember why we sat on the kitchen floor, I just remember that we did; that he would get down there with me and nothing else mattered which conveyed the most beautiful truth to me: that I MATTERED!

So, life is crazy over here.  Owen is, quite literally, a ball of energy.  Yesterday, before I could even grasp what was happening, he climbed onto a chair, pulled himself up the back and SUMMERSAULTED over the top.  Thankfully, he landed straight in my lap, but I'm fairly certain that was coincidence!  His pediatrician predicts that if he stays on his current growth curve, he'll be six feet tall!  Oh, and he's been peeing in his little man toilet!  (But, if we're being honest here I should probably admit that he's also peed on his favorite teddy bear and all over the living room rug!  Am I allowed to duct tape the diaper onto this child?)  He learns new words on a daily basis and brings us more joy than we ever thought possible!!  But, yeah.. it's a crazy life!
A few nights ago, on the way home from a downtown adventure, I reached back to the little man's carseat and he grabbed onto my hand.  His little fingers wrapped tight around mine and he held fast until we got home; a good 10 minutes!  I told Derek my arm was cramped up in ways I didn't realize possible, but there was NO WAY I was retracting my hand.  Those moments are the cherry on top.  In his own way, my tiny son was letting me know that I matter.  It can be all crazy and messy and 'Owweeennnn, stop pulling the cat's tail!'  But in that still, sweet moment with his fingers grasping mine, I know that I matter to him more than he'll ever be able to put into words.  And when my husband asks me, at the end of a day, when it's quiet and I have room to answer honestly, 'How are you holding up?' I know it then too, that he truly sees me and that I matter.
Isn't this what is so astonishing about God's grace and what He did for us?!  We matter to the King of kings! When we were at our worst He sent His Son to take our place. And in spite of having absolutely nothing to offer, He chooses US!  He gets down on our level, meets us where we're at, whispers 'Child, YOU MATTER!' He redeems us! Romans 5:8 'But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.'  And when we first realize this truth it's breathtaking; it drops us to our knees.  But as the years go by, the intensity can fade and the routine can take over and perhaps it's time to stop rushing and remember the price that was paid.  Maybe the only One that matters is calling, waiting, longing to spend time with us.  Nothing fancy, just us and Him and the truth about where we're at- but it could be the most beautiful part of our day!  It could make all the difference.
I don't know where you're at today.  Maybe you desperately need to hear the words, 'Child, YOU MATTER!' Perhaps you are lost, forgotten, broken or just distracted; it makes no difference. Jesus sees you and He will meet you where you're at because you mean EVERYTHING to Him!  Or maybe you need to rearrange some priorities; be deliberate about letting people in your life know that THEY matter to you!  More than the lists, more than keeping up appearances, more than social media or whatever your addiction may be; the people in your life (in MY LIFE!) matter more and today is the day to show them.
So, let's get after it..